i found out my biggest wish today..
- i want to be a good mother for my kids, and to able to give them what they need to be the best that they can be in life.

<3

it's funny how little things can make you feel all better,

and it's funny how only the right people can make you smile when you have a bad day..

i feel so lonely without you ...

kan det virkelig passe at jeg skal gå og have det af HELVEDE til hver eneste gang der er den mindste ubalance i kosmos!? - det synes jeg virkelig ikke er iorden, og det værste er at jeg ikke engang ved hvem jeg skal skælde ud!

suk ... - jeg ved godt at jeg brød et løfte, men det var jo kun fordi jeg vidste at du ville blive sur hvis jeg sagde det.. kan du ikke forstå det? jeg vidste at det ville blive sådan her, og jeg ville bare så gerne udskyde det og forblive venner lidt længere. er det så forkert at ville beholde dig i mit liv? du ved jo slet ikke hvordan jeg virkelig har det med dig. du tror ikke at "sådan en som mig" ville kunne være interesseret i "sådan en som dig". men hvordan kan du være i tvivl? tror du selv jeg ville kysse dig så meget som jeg gjorde hvis jeg ikke var!? - IDIOT!

sandheden er, jeg holder mere af dig end jeg burde. og et eller andet sted burde det jeg føler være nok, men det er det bare ikke.. der er noget der holder mig tilbage og jeg kan ikke fortælle dig hvorfor eller hvad.. jeg ved ikke hvor længer jeg bliver i mit nuværende forhold, men jeg ville virkelig ønske at du ville blive lidt længere?

jeg elsker dig ...

i'm afraid. it hurts. and with every breath i take, it hurts even more. and i am so afriad. nothing seems to work out the good way for me at the moment. i just need to get back to school. i don't think a long time away from school is good for me. not right now anyway. but then again, going back might not be as good as i hope? nick isn't going to be there. neither is jake. jeppe is not interested in me anymore. i don't have anything to look forward to. other than fall, but that's not going to last forever is it? no, it isn't. it's not fair. loosing someone i care about is not something i'm good at. hell, no one is good at that. what am i going to do? i have no idea...

day of birth

jeg har fødsesldag idag

So he is leaving, my big giant. I am going to miss him so much. He is someone I really can’t imagine my life without, and now, he is leaving. He always lifts me up and carries me around and he makes me laugh. He sat beside me in the plane when I flew for the first time. He was with me when I had the greatest experience of m life. He gave me all these amazing memories that I am never going to forget. I love him, and the thought of him, not being there, sitting next to me every day, making me smile is saddening me. I think that it is so unfair! I really don't think that stunt was necessary. they could just have told him, that he would be kicked out if he didn't start to take this seriously. how am I going to go through last year of high school when he is not wiht me? I don't know.